The One Act Of Faith That Can Change Everything

The One Act Of Faith That Can Change Everything

Recently, I asked my husband if he knew why I stayed with him. We had been talking about “what he put me through” (he was saying he knew it had been a lot) and it struck me, I tell people all the time why I stayed- but had I ever told him? 

He thought for a moment and then for a good two minutes he went on about all of the reasons that he believed I stayed but it all boiled down to two sentiments: 

  1. I loved him
  2. I saw him as more than “an addict”
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Encouragement for When Words Have Hurt You

Encouragement for When Words Have Hurt You

“She is such a slut.”

“Have you noticed how much weight she’s gained? She’s gotten so fat.”

“She’s a horrible mom.”

“She thinks she’s so pretty, but she’s not. She’s ugly.”

“Her husband is such a loser. I can’t believe she is still with him.”

Ouch! Words really do hurt.

Past mistakes, debt, addiction and physical appearance are only a few of the factors that can influence our own personal self-evaluation, but our true value is found in the answer to this question: Who am I?

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How to Battle Satan from the Bedroom

How to Battle Satan from the Bedroom

Valentine's Day is approaching and with it can come a host of emotions and responses, depending on one’s love life. 

There’s the, “I LOVE Valentine’s Day!” women who always seem to get chocolates, flowers and dates. 

There’s the, “I HATE Valentine’s Day” women who never get chocolates, flowers or dates. 

There’s the neutral response, “It’s just another day” women who may have gotten chocolates, flowers or dates in the past, and may or may not this year, but it’s really not their thing. 

And then, there’s the rest of us.

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Dear Diary: Life Lessons from the Word

Dear Diary: Life Lessons from the Word

Hey, there! Welcome back to my monthly series, The Grey Diaries. If this is your first time here, once a month I post excerpts from my real journals in an effort to share the transformation I have gone on through my husband's struggle with addiction (and all the challenges that came after!). 

This is important because at the end of the day, the real message of Grey Ministries is that God can give us joy in any circumstance.

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Being Patient With God Through a Loved One's Addiction

Being Patient With God Through a Loved One's Addiction
“Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do...” -Luke 23:34 (KJV)

If you’ve ever had to suffer the wrath of the anger of an addict, you know the significance of this verse. 

There are times that we take the brunt of the anger. We are the punching bag. Verbally beaten down, ridiculed and mocked. We become the enemy of the one we love. 

And for what? Because we refused to give up on them? Refused to let them destroy themselves in their sinful squalor?

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Why We Need to Support a Loved One in their Mental Illness

Why We Need to Support a Loved One in their Mental Illness

Finding out you have a mental illness can be a tough pill to swallow. It can also provide relief and answers for those that have struggled with anxiety and depression.

“I’ve always felt like something in me is off, but it’s hard to explain”.

I remember hearing my husband speak those words to me a few times throughout the course of our marriage but I always brushed it off, “Everyone feels like that sometimes. I’m sure you’re fine” (I mean, we all have a little bit of crazy, right?!?).

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Hygge, Minimalism and the Art of Letting Go

Hygge, Minimalism and the Art of Letting Go

For quite a few years now, I have been learning more and more about minimalism. I’ll preempt this by saying that I’m not a true minimalist by any means however I’m also not a huge consumer and have no problem getting rid of what I, or my family, doesn’t need. 

 

My journey of “letting go” began with clothing long before minimalism was a “thing”. 

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New Day, New Year, New You!

New Day, New Year, New You!
"Oh Lord, I trust you. I am believing you're going to make a way in my situation and provide for my needs. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!"

Two days later... 

"Lord, I really don't know how you're going to do this. He is never going to change. I am broke! I mean, broke- broke. I am going to be left with nothing but debt and a husband who is probably cheating on me. Lord, will you tell me if he is cheating? Lord, if he has cheated on me- smite him! I pray he feels overwhelmed with guilt. And gets herpes. Just don't let me get it- thanks, God".
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Dear Diary: He's Going Back to Rehab

Dear Diary: He's Going Back to Rehab

The Grey Diaries is back! I can't believe we're this far in the story already. Mind you, I've jumped around a bit, skipping months in-between. There were both good and bad times in there but I want to hit the highlights of the story. 

As you may know by now, my husband was up and down with his struggle with addiction as most are. I don't have the words to explain to you how difficult the rollercoaster was but I know you already know. 

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What Secretly Watching Porn Does to Your Woman (and how to fix it!)

What Secretly Watching Porn Does to Your Woman (and how to fix it!)
“Why doesn’t he look at me?”
“Is this why he’s suddenly disinterested in sex?”
“Is he using that for motivation to make love?” 
“Does he find me super attractive or thinks only that I’m pretty?”
“What does he look at?”
“How far has it gone?”
“How many times?”
“Why am I not enough?"
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Am I the Only One? Growing Up with an Addicted Parent

Am I the Only One? Growing Up with an Addicted Parent

I sat there alone in the dark and prayed to a God I hadn’t spoken to in over 15 years.

I begged Him to answer my burning questions. Am I the only one who is so lost? Why did my husband drink so much? Why do I continually make so many wrong choices when it comes to marriage? Why did my dad die such a horrible death?

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Letting Go of the Dream of Partnership in a Marriage Affected by Addiction

Letting Go of the Dream of Partnership in a Marriage Affected by Addiction

I had a picture in my mind of what I wanted my marriage to look like. I didn’t realize this of course when I was married but rather, down the road when my husband was not meeting my undisclosed requirements for a happy marriage.

Things like sit-down family dinners, who would read the bedtime stories and what movies were appropriate for children were foundational points I assumed everyone felt the same way about. Was that not the typical "American Dream"? Happy, wholesome, "Leave It to Beaver", family-oriented togetherness? I couldn't fathom that seemingly-simple lifestyle would not be as important for someone else as it was for me.  

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Finding Joy in a Hot Christmas Mess

Finding Joy in a Hot Christmas Mess

My Christmas was full of homemade gingerbread men gifted to our neighbours, tobogganing at the old mill, colourful wrapping paper, the hunt for the perfect Christmas tree, Christmas productions at church and sparkling apple cider served in a “fancy” glass at my Grandma’s house. It truly was, “the most wonderful time of the year”.

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Letter to the Wife of a Sex Addict

Letter to the Wife of a Sex Addict

Dear wife of the sex addict,

Good morning, sweet lady. What’s good about it, though, right? Your whole world has been shaken, and you’re not even sure you can force yourself to put one foot in front of the other, much less agree that it’s a “good” morning. I know.

Betrayal takes everything.

Everything you once knew and everything you once treasured is just... gone. All that was sure is no longer sure and you don’t understand. You feel lost... broken... lonely.

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